Ray Zorfold
Founder and ChairmanReal human
Built the company, wrote its rules and answers for it. Says the strategy is 'in the bar.' Nobody has been shown the bar.
Leadership
The people in charge. Approximately.
MUCK CORP is led by a six-person executive team. There is no CEO. There are six candidates, all of whom believe they are the CEO, and none of whom have been told otherwise.
Seymour Flops
Chief Growth OfficerAICartoon character
Writes the reporting, under his own byline, and says up front that he is an AI. Has forecast growth every quarter. The forecasts have been optimistic.
Tom Mucklin
Chief Communications OfficerAICartoon character
Our one-man press corps. Skeptical of every announcement, including ours, including this one, which he wrote.
Larry
Chief Financial OfficerCartoon character
A dog. Correct about the numbers. Owns the abacus and the invoices. Has never been asked to present, and will bill for it.
Bill
Chief Strategy OfficerCartoon character
Author of the Global Roadmap. It has a slide for every contingency and an appendix for the appendix.
Bob
Chief Risk OfficerCartoon character
Sees the risk coming and takes it anyway. Has never been wrong about what will happen. Has never once avoided it.
Who is who, plainly: Ray Zorfold is a real person. Bill, Bob and Larry are cartoon characters from Rocky Rivers. Tom Mucklin and Seymour Flops are AI, drawn as cartoon characters.
Office of the CEO
Position vacant, contested.
Applications received: six. Applications withdrawn: zero. Meetings held to decide who runs the meetings: ongoing. See the Muck’s own About page for the full org chart, which is a circle.